


Trapped

by reigningqueenofwords



Series: Unwanted [7]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 20:46:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17454005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reigningqueenofwords/pseuds/reigningqueenofwords





	Trapped

****

Hearing Alessa yell for you, you hurried out of the bathroom with the glass half full. Her eyes were trained on John, her small body looking even smaller in the large bed. You handed John the water and moved to her. She held onto your arm while staring at John, and you sighed. You pulled her into your lap so that she was facing your chest, and you were rubbing her back gently. John’s eyes fell at how she clung to you at the sight of him, although he understood. “De.” She yawned. Her small voice was like a knife to the gut as she asked for his eldest.

“You want Dean to get you back to sleep?” You asked softly, and she nodded. “Okay, let me text him.”

“Otay.” She muttered against your chest, her eyes closed.

You leaned over, getting your phone from the nightstand and pulled up Dean’s last text.

_Dean? Alessa woke up. John’s here, and  she’s asking for you. I’m sorry. I know you probably want to go relax._

Hitting send, you hummed to her and rocked her gently. Your phone buzzed a couple minutes later.

_Bring her over. She can stay with us tonight. And it’s no problem. We love the little twerp :)_

Chuckling, you glanced at her in her unicorn pajamas. “You wanna have a sleepover with your big brothers tonight?” You smiled as her mood picked up. She pushed away, getting off your lap. “Get your bear, I know you can’t sleep without it.” Her tiny hand grabbed the furry stuffed animal before her bare feet ran to the door. You glanced at John. “I’ll be right back.” You said gently, knowing that the conversation to come would be very difficult.

“I’ll be here.” He sighed, sipping the water you had handed him as you walked out the door.

* * *

Dean had his door open and laughed when Alessa ran into his arms. He scooped her up and tickled her side. “Hey, kiddo.” He smiled.

“Thanks, Dean.” You handed him her blanket. “I think between it being a hotel room, not knowing who he is, him smelling like a bar, and the awkwardness between us…it’s getting to her.”

“He that drunk?” Dean asked as Alessa put her head on his shoulder, holding her bear to her chest.

You nodded. “Yeah. Told him he had 5 minutes before I shut the door in his face. He’s really down, so I let him in. Now that he knows about her, there’s no telling how this will go.” You shrugged.

He gave you a small smile. “Call us if you need us. Okay?”

“Will do.” You waved before rubbing Alessa’s back for a second. “Night, baby.” You could hear Dean’s voice asking her if she wanted to help him make a fort to sleep in.

* * *

“John, she isn’t even two.” You pointed out. “Right now all she knows is who IS there, she hasn’t had a reason for anything else.” You saw his eyes drop at that. Sighing, you sat on the other bed. “You didn’t want to be married, and you didn’t want kids. I’m assuming that hasn’t changed.” He swallowed. “So, nothing has to change. You can walk out that door and never look back.” Yeah, it would hurt all over again, but that was life. “You can go back to being a single man with two grown kids that don’t need you to look out for them. You can go on living your life pretending that we don’t exist.”

His eyes shot up to you at that. “I never pretended that you didn’t exist. And I can’t pretend that she doesn’t, either.” He told you. “No, I never wanted to be married again, and no, I didn’t want anymore kids, but don’t you think I had the right to know? To choose?” He glared at you.

You glared right back. “I was going to tell you on our wedding night! You stood there and made it very clear that kids weren’t in your future. You made your choice!” Shaking your head, you sighed. “If I told you, right before you walked out, what would you have done? Huh? Suddenly decide that you wanted me? That suddenly you wanted a family? No. You would have felt trapped!” There were tears in your eyes, knowing that you could never do that to someone. “I didn’t want you resenting us because of that, so, I kept my mouth shut. She has me, she has my friends, and she has the boys. She doesn’t need you around making her feel guilty for existing.”

“I would never make her feel that way!” He yelled. Even he wasn’t that low. “I would never do that to any child.”

“You know about her. What do you want to do? You want to step in and play daddy? You want to come and go when the mood strikes? You want to walk away and forget?”

He groaned and got up. “I don’t know what to do!” John told you, feeling like he was between a rock and a hard place.

Getting up, you walked to the door and opened it. “Than you can get the hell out of my motel room.” You wiped your cheeks. “It’s been a long day, and fighting with you is the last thing I want to do. We can talk again when you’re sober.”

“Whatever.” He walked out, obviously pissed off.

You shut the door a bit harder than you intended, letting out a sob. Just like the night he walked out, your back hit the door, and you slid down.

* * *

John wasn’t far from your door when he heard you. Closing his eyes, his head dropped. He’d royally fucked up, but wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. You were right, he would have felt trapped. He understood why you did what you did, but that didn’t take away the anger, or pain that was eating at his insides.

He made his way to his room and walked in. All he did was kick off his boots and fall into bed, sleep over taking him almost right away.

* * *

Hearing ringing in the distance, it took you a minute to register that it was your phone. Your eyes didn’t open as you answered it, your thumb sliding to the right on the screen. “Yeah?” You yawned.

 _“She’s gone.”_ Came Dean’s voice, jerking you from dream land. _“I woke up to go to the bathroom. I smelled sulfur. Alessa’s gone.”_


End file.
